If i could beat up any animated character, cartoon or anime wise,

i think i would pick...jerry (from tom and jerry), or any of jerry's relatives (his strong cousin, his bitch ass white mouse cousin, etc.). I always felt hella bad for Tom getting jacked by Jerry and then getting jacked by his owner.

Then after I kicked Jerry's and his family's ass, i'd go outside and kick the living SHIT outta that dog that always beat up Tom. That bitch ass bitch dog. WTF. You get your rocks off by chewing on defenseless cats? I'll beat the kibbles and bits outta you. And dont hink your punk ass kid is safe either. I'll punt that punk to the moon.

Another meaningless post! =D

k you guys remeber that kid's song about eating worms? It goes like this...

Nobody likes me
Everybody hates me
I guess i'll go eat worms.

and that's about as far as I get before I start laughing. Dude, WHAT THE FUCK. No one likes you SO YOU GUESS YOU'LL GO EAT WORMS? HAHAHA!!! How fucking RANDOM is that??? That's like saying

Nobody likes me
Everybody hates me
I guess i'll do some math.

What the hell does eating worms have to do with no one liking you?

The darker side of this song is maybe it's insiunating a connection with substance abuse. you dislike yourself so you turn to drugs. But that STILL doesn't make any sense because at least if you were to take drugs you'd get some sort of high and feel better. But WORMS would just taste like SHIT!

I have seriously been laughing while writing this whole entry. That song is beyond random and does not make any sense to me. I will say it again.

WHY WOULD YOU EAT WORMS IF NO ONE LIKED YOU? How bout working out? or buying some new toys or video games??? How bout getting some new clothes? That could win you some friends, but I DONT THINK EATING WORMS WILL.

Moral the story: Kids are stupid.

LOL. LOLZ ROFLMAO WTF BBQ.

some days i find no inspiration to write. Then some days it hits in the face with no warning.

First off, I was watching P. Diddy's "bad boys of comedy", a series on hbo. This show is like any other stand up comic show, except they can say bad words cuz it's on pay per view. And even though the viewer is forced to see p. diddy every show (wtf is he doing on the show anyways. he's not funny. and he can't dance either. Not that that has anything to do with comedy, but when you dance as bad as p. diddy, it makes everything you do seem dumber.). Anyways, there was this one comedian, big black guy, making jokes about how fat he was. I will not repeat the bit he did, because there is no way I want to take away from the funniness of it, but OMFG. I was laughing SO HARD. I have not LAUGHED THAT HARD in a LONG ASS TIME. I laughed SO hard that my eyes were pouring with tears, and the next day my abs were sore as FUCK. Then for days afterward, every time i thought of the bit, or said it out loud, i would crack up. Holy shit that was some funny shit.

Anyways, to the real reason for writing is for my 15 minute review of the movie "Jersey girl". This movie stars ben affleck, george carlin, and some little girl as ben's daughter. I have no idea what this movie is about. How little do i know? Well, i can't tell you the names of any of the characters, what the major plot crisis is, who the love interest is. Anyways, from the 15 minutes that i saw the movie I immediately thought, "bullshit!!!". Why? Two big reasons (I would have more, but I only saw 15 minutes).
1) No one would have an "awkward moment" with their friend when both of their emotions come out after a push. wtf. "just friends, right?" "right".
2) the bigger reason: So ben gets an interview for some firm in new york city. But he currently lives in new jersey with unknown little girl at his dad's, george carlin. Anyways, ben gets all happy and tells them all that he's gonna get a job there and they're gonna move back to new york city. Unknown little girl (ULG) then says she doesn't wanna go and says she doesn't want to move back there and throws a fit. BULLSHIT. If a parent worked as HIGH WAY WORKER (i think that's what he does), and he gets the opportunity to move to some city to get a job that pays a lot more, well...okay fuck that whole reasoning. I'll make it simple. Parent wants to move because of important financial reasons. Tells kid they're going to move. Kid complains. Parent says too bad. Kid complains some more. Parent offers if the kid would like to get a job scooping shit so that they an pitch in for the cost of living. Kid moves happily to new city and HANDLES it cuz that's what REALITY IS LIKE YOU LITTLE SHIT!!!!. LOL!!! Anyways, I've never moved (25 years in shitball san jose), but i would think that if your parents wanted to move due to FINANCIAL REASONS (dad or mom can get a much better job), then you SHUT YOUR FACE AND YOU HANDLE IT cuz WHO IS SUPPORTING YOUR ASS??? Yeah, ULG, YEAH! GET YOUR ASS OFF THE FLOOR CUZ YOU'VE BEEN SERVED!!! SERVED!!! SERVED !!! SERVED!!!

And finally, I will end with a joke said by Nick Dapalo (sp?) at Comedy Central's Roast of Pamela Anderson. He had just finished talking about how he used to masteurbate to her on baywatch every day onto his TV screen. "I used to wack off so much on your face I thought the only way I'd recognize you in public is if you had just smashed a glazed donut all over your face"

btw, i JUST got the joke. "I just flew in from ____ and boy are my arms tired." It's not that i didn't get the joke, it's that i didn't think about it and then like....ah fuck it...yeh i'm stupid. =P

Poppin' Robin is not a cool poppin' name because it has nothing to do with me.
Funkface is a much better poppin name for me but Jon already took that one.

jumping the gap is a huge task. it racks u mentally, physically, and emotionally. the positive side of it is that it's a learning experience. The negative side of it is that sucks ass.

everyone xangas and blogs about how it's gonna be hard and all that, but you all have no idea.

for those of you who know what i'm talking about, you probably understand and are nodding your head.
for those of you who don't, you're probably shaking your hand and drooling with your tongue out.
okay, those are two words i hate typing because I always mistype them.
tongue. which someone always turns into tounge
toilet. which turns into toliet
quiet. which turns into quite.

Elvis Presley - A Little Less Conversation (JXL Remix). [it HAS to be the remix. you'll probably remember this song from Ocean's 11, starting The Exception aka B. Pitt]

Why is B.Pitt called "The Exception"? Because he is the one man alive who none of the typical guy rules apply to. Yes, Brad can walk into a club and point at a girl and she will dance with him immediately and she will sleep with him too. Yes, Brad can do the "backdoor surprise" on the dance floor and the girl will not only be happy about it, but she will dance with him all night long. Yes, Brad can wear anything. Yes, Brad can not shave and no girl will be bothered by it. Yes, Brad can star in real girly movies and still be considered the bad ass from "Fight Club". Yes, Brad can go out with a hot girl, and then go out with a hotter girl, while that first girl has no choice but to move down because Brad is at the top. This is the kind of man to be put on a pedestle. And that's why Brad Pitt is awesome. I love you Brad!!! (in a totally non-gay way!! Well, maybe a little...lol)

When i went to Japan, there's this city called Nara. Nara has a lot of deer. The deer roam the streets and stuff because there are laws against hurting them. They sit by this guy that sells rice crackers that are to be bought for the sole purpose of feeding the deer. They sit. and they sit. Then when they see a stupid tourist (i.e. me) buy the crackers, they immediately bum rush him (i.e. me) in an attempt to eat his (i.e. me) hand off to get to the crackers. Then the tourist must throw the crackers away from him in order to keep his hand and to look stupid in front of all the locals, who giggle incessantly.

Why bring up this example? Well, I figure that if i ever got the chance to meet the aforementioned b. pitt, I would have to shake his hand without letting the hordes of woman around see me do so. For if i did, i'm pretty sure they would be like the deer, and would wait till I let go of his hand and bum rush me. They woud try and lick and eat my hand because it just touched the aforementioned b. pitt. And having your hand eaten off, no matter how hot the girl is, would suck.

And that concludes my wasting of five minutes of your life.

No you cannot have them back.

you wanna be mushy on ur xanga/blog. fine. you wanna put endless quotes and stories about how much you love your bf. fine. you wanna cover the entire front and back and left and right with pics of you and him. fine. you wanna make your xanga vomit inducing. fine.

but dont put pics of your bf half naked!!! Dude no one wants to see that shit!!!

And yes i'm saying this cuz i'm attractiveness-challenged and yes i'm saying this cuz i'm more singles than Kraft (oh my, how witty!) and yes i'm saying this cuz (see last post, first part)

Why does pepsi one exist when diet pepsi is around. Like one calorie is gonna make a difference.

omg, the strawberry festival is tomorrow. STRAWBERRIES. Perhaps they will have strawberry ice cream. PERHAPS. Strawberries are like a "special occassion" type of fruit, cuz when you have them, you KNOW it's gonna be a party in your mouth (or in your pants if you really like them). I mean, you always have apples and oranges and bananas around, but how often do you have strawberries? And lemme tell you, people NEVER have strawberries at breakfast time in their cornflakes like how it shows on the box. I remember when i was kid eating those bland ass cornflakes I used to be like, "damn look at the box. hella strawberries. I want strawberries." but NO!

my tire fucking split apart while I was driving in the fastest lane of 280.

I had my music up loud. And then all of a sudden my steering wheel starts shaking like crazy in my hand. Then it starts vibrating so hard my hands almost go numb.

so I quickly pull over, and I open my door and i smell it immediately. TIRE FUNK.

I look look at the back tire and it's flatter than a _______________ (Enter something that you think is flat. Be creative)

And it's hella torn apart. Like SUPER FLAT.

Good thing i know how to change a tired. I put the donut on. And off I went. Now I gotta get new tires cuz i know driving on this thing isn't smart. Man why dont they make spare tires regular tires!!

Now i'm all paranoid cuz I'm worried that people who see me driving will think "Damn look at that ghetto ass mother fucker with three real wheels and one donut wheel" And yes they will drive around my entire car so they can think that.

So I bought this new trance CD cuz i haven't bought trance in forever and a day..and I got to listening it.

And that got me to thinking how i still haven't gone to my 'last' rave.

So then I thought I'd go to this because I really like the Skills DJs (Dyloot and Tom Slik)




And then I can do some of this..


Pre-photon days (this was...2000?) BTW, notice J-Pop in the back doing his thang.

And see some of this...


wow. His arms must be tired


CHEATER. If you ain't using your arms, you're CHEATING.

Yes. Finally. A rave. Tickets are going on sale soon. Who wants to come with? Time to make sure all my photons are working right. And make sure my arms wont' fall off. I remember back in the day the day after I would go to a rave my knuckles would be all black and blue from the photons hitting them. I never realized how fast I was moving my hands until I went to this one rave where the dance floor was surrounded my mirrors. That was the rave that was at this bowling alley out in the middle of nowhere. I remember that rave cuz hella aphio people went, I saw the dopest glowsticker ever, and Sarah hugged the sweatiest guy ever.

ah the good old days.

raves were always about the dancing. no hate on the prescription users -- just not my thang. Yes, before I learned how to dance to hip hop, before I decided to learn how to pop, it was all about raving. Glowsticks, rave dancing, and photons. I tried the stings, but then I hit myself in the balls and I decided to keep it simple. Raves were always so much fun, and we always had the same routine: Go in and chill for 45 minutes just listening to the music, and then dance, then go outside to cool down, then repeat for 6 hours. The music was awesome, the company was awesome, and it was first time that i felt alive on the dance floor.

I never really understood all the kids that decided to dress up as Tigger or Rainbow Bright, or cover themselves in beads, or give themselves rave names (there are no parents who would name their boy "Cloud" or "Whisper" ...this ain't the 60s)

Nevertheless, I'll never forget how much fucking fun I had at those raves. My mom would hate it when I went..I know ur thinking, dude why did you tell her?? But when I would hit up a rave when i was back in SJ, these raves would go till like 4 or 5 AM!! I had to tell my mom where I was going. My friend told her mom that she was going on a church retreat, and another friend told his mom that he was going bowling (till 5am). I remember when I would get home from those raves I would smell so bad (hey you would stink too if you were dancing for 7 hours in a giant room with a bunch of people who are sweating, smoking, and covered in vic's vapor rub) that I would strip down to my boxers and throw all my clothes in the back yard to air out before I put a foot on the carpet.

Aight. enough reminsicing. Back to the final (again).

I think stretching is the best thing ever. Coffee is not anymore. Stretching comes along after a few other things of pleasure. Check it:

List of pleasurable things:
1) Sex (of course)
2-7 (all tied): peeing, pooing, stretching, eating good food, scratching an really crazy itch, getting that one BIG burp after a bunch of unsuccessful small burps to release the gas hounds that were in your stomach.

Thanks for the feedback on the poem everyone. I'll put all of that feedback into my next version of it.

I wish I could make my blog all snazzy and shit so that when you first arrive a million popups pop up saying "hi how are you? omg today such a great day today!" etc. etc. etc. and the text would move across the screen and the computer would lift off your desk and fly out the window. But i dont know any computer coding, so it'll just have to just stay this boring nature green with the blurry watevers behind the lame title.

To the comments, yes, 'tis true, it is better to be in love. And there are some times when you really want to be in love. To be able to have someone to talk to at the end of the day just to get your mind off of things, and you dont have to worry bout them not wanting to talk to you because you know that that phone call is the one thing that both of you are looking forward to. Yah. That would be sweet. Unfortunately, I'm a guy, and i dont have the kind of access that girls do. I'm not saying that girls can just run and jump to the next guy, but they definitely have better resources. And if you're a guy and you get mad about that, well, unfortunately you'll have to slap yourself because US GUYS are the reason why they act like that. It's important to rememeber that the actions of one sex is usually dictated by the actions of the other. Girls you can't get mad at us for being stupid and us guys can't get mad at you girls for being evil...because we're repsonsible for the vica versa of the actions of the other party on the side where the grass is greener because you should look before you leap...and ..yeah. Anyways you get what i'm saying.

Anyways, in my days of being alone, I've come to the conclusion (or justification, if you will =P) that you can deal with being alone and wanting to be in love in two ways
1) you can be all sad and depressed and bitter and look absolutely desperate (probably not a good idea)
2) you can explore your emotions, let it out, be hopefully, and be happy that you are capable of such a great thing. (probably a better idea)

Cuz hey! And i'm gonna sound like Tony Robbins for a second here, but you're good enough. I mean we all are. I think every person alive deserves to feel like they're in love. It's a great feeling. And if you're alone and ugly (like me! =D -> =*( lol) and you feel like, "SHIT everyone has someone except me!" or "Man I can't find the right person!!", think of it like this:
Relationships are like ice cream. yeah. ICE CREAM. mmmm ICE CREAM...anyways. Ice cream. You know, there's this place in Berkeley. It's called Fenton's. It's an ice cream place. Hella good sundaes, and they're huge too. Anyways, I went there once when i was really young. I can still remember how the sundae tasted. But then the place burned down, and after my grandparents passed away, I didn't really go up to Berkeley much. Then, just a few months ago, I went to go pay my respects to my grandma and grandpa, and my family stopped there. Oh man. It was just as good as i remembered..in fact, it was even better, because it had been so long and I was more able to appreciate the really good ice cream now that I was older.

AHA! see the correlation of the subjective advocates of the contralateral objectives of the basil ganglia????

If relationships are like ice cream, then maybe you gotta look at it like it's okay if you haven't had one in a long time, or you keep getting the wrong flavors. Maybe all that time in between ice creams will make that next time just as good as the first time you had ice cream, but more likely even better. A lot of people just want the ice cream, eating scoop and after scoop after scoop. And then they get cavities and their mouth gets all rotten and gross and then no more ice cream for them (See the analogy there too??? =D) Anyways, all the time inbetween will make you appreciate that next ice cream you have all the much more because you're older, wiser, and because yo, ice cream is always better when you can really truly enjoy it, right?

I shoulda got my masters in psychology. YAH! hhahahaha.

Back to work and then the library till midnight! I love you life..GRRRR
- - -
(jacked from LL Cool B's xanga. good quotes!)
Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.
Frank Loyd Wright

Break a vase, and the love that reassembles the fragments is stronger than that love which took its symmetry for granted when it was whole.
Derek Walcott

coffee is truly one of the awesomest things in the world. I dont drink it all too often, only because i want to keep its effects on me high. Just a few minutes ago I was falling asleep at my desk, and now I'm so full of energy that I have to tap my foot just to get the excess energy out. My productivity just shot up at least like 60 percent. Sweet. I love you coffee, but i love you caffine even more.

This weekend was pretty sick. First on sat i chilled with minh, scott, and melo. We went to McCarthy Ranch and ate chinese food and ate taiwanese nuts. (Taiwanese nuts = Taiwanese balls = Boba). We talked alot about stuff and caught up. Then we watched the end of this stupid kung fu movie. G was gonna meet up with us, but his car broke down so he had to parlay with his parents instead. We also made plans to roll up to Reno this Sunday, but we'll see if that goes down.

Sunday was awesome. I went to Monterey with a bunch of people. The aquarium was awesome!!! First off i got the student price cuz i'm a student once again (score). I haven't been there in about 10 years. OMG. The jellyfish are so fucking awesome. The sharks are cool too. But the best thing for me was the sea otters. They really know how to wow the crowd. I love that place. I'd go back tomorroow and the next day and the next day if i could. I wanna make a hella huge donation to the place so that i can go feed the sea otters.

The only drawback was there was HELLA kids. HELLA kids. I mean HELLA kids. And with HELLA kids, there's HELLA parents. and with HELLA parents there' s hella play by play for their HELLA kids. and in that HELLA play by play there's HELLA BULLSHIT. I was walking by this tank where there were these fish who burrow themselves into the sand up to their necks. Anyways, this one was in the sand, and another one was swimming by it. This mom says to her son, "see that, see how they build the home for themselves. OH! Look at that other one..he's upset because the other fish is trying to get into his house (note: he wasn't) That's how they guard their territory. It's nature's way of blah blah blah". WRONG LADY. ALL WRONG. The kid must have known he was getting swamped with BS too, cuz he ran over to the shark tank, and smashed the glass so that the shark could eat him. Kids are HELLA rude too. They all step on your feet and run in front of you. That's the worst part: the running in front of u. I mean these mother fuckers can head butt you in the nuts cuz they're all erratic and shit. So whenever a kid ran in front of me at an exhibit, I would cover my nuts. Good thing too cuz I woulda caught this one kid's shoulder right in the goods. And then HE would have feed the sea otters. Literally. =D

BTW, if i had stripped and jumped into the beach where all the birds were and acted like a monkey, I would have made $217.95 courtesy of J-Pop. If i'm ever super broke i'll take him up on that offer fo sho.

Midday, we went to go eat at Bubba Gump. I figured I wasn't going to eat there again (soon anyways), so i got the "bucket of boat trash" (shrimp, lobster, mahi mahi, and fries). Yo that was OUTTA HAND. It was so good I almost ate my fingers. It was so good I almost ate the bucket it was in. Hella free crackers of all kinds, and I almost got Jon to reach over and eat Mrs. H's food. Ya heard?

Later on, we headed down to the wharf to eat dinner. Kinda. There was some miscommunication about that part of the trip, but it was okay because the whole ordeal ended up in two things for me: 1) ICE CREAM. Yo I dunno what happened to me but i HELLA love ice cream now. So while everyone else was not eating, I went to get some strawberry ice cream. good stuff. The girl hella hooked it up too. 2) HELLA LAUGHS. Dude, i dunno how one little thing (FS - Thanks for the hope!!! high five!!!) could start up so many laughs, but it did. All sorts of other topics came up too (weiner hands, penis palms, J-pop's Pee pee spot). The quick stop was worth it just for those things. We almost stopped to eat at the wharf at this one restaurant at the very end where this sea captain who was dressed like a pimp was handing out free clam chowda, but the menu was pretty shitty.

So then we headed to Gilroy and stopped at this one place called Black Bear or something. The eats was pretty good, but poor Jon. Stuck in the bathroom for hella long trying to do the doo. He walks out and tony and shan are all clapping. I find out the next day that dude got food poisoning! Poor guy. Brendan also enlightened us with info about how he would take his PSP into the bathroom and play for like 2 hours -- so long that he didn't need to wipe cuz the shit would just dry up (literally). He then tells us how his legs would fall asleep and Tony added how he would get these red spots on his legs from leaning too long. Funny shit.

So all in all, hella jokes. hella fun. I got the chance to chill with Jen and to get to know her bf Aaron better (who is one hella cool cat, I gotta say). This weekend finally gave me the chance to let my personality out. I felt like I used to back in my college days. And it felt great.

And then back to work. Back to the grind. i got to turn in my final on Thursday, and i got full time work this whole week. This weekend i'm heading down to LA to check out this poppin' convention, ifyou will. Poppin, locking, and breakin. One of my favorite poppin' crews is gonna be battling, so I really wanna check that out.
- - -
I got a lot of time on my hands. More than the typical person. Life changed so quickly for me last August that the circumstances I was given was extreme. I realized that yesterday. I had to cope with it, with no help from anyone else. This was my challenge.

Why do I think about stuff so intensely? Why do i spend so much time trying to understand myself and those around me? It's because I want to always have empathy. This class I took on emotions this summer, I had to study human emotions in computers and stuff. and one of the things I read papers on was the human emotion of empathy. To understand the emotional state of others. This is what drives the human connection between two people. It strengthens relationships. And i think that's what I want to do. If i can somehow understand what you're feeling or going through, on any level, then it'll make you feel good because it's nice when someone understands. And of course it'll make me feel good for being able to help u.

That and i think that relationships and how we feel are so fucking INTERESTING. I remember when i was in grade school and jr. high I would observe people "going around". That's what they called it. There was no such thing as dating because we were all like 12 - 14. People would just sit next to each other at lunch time and hold hands. I would also kick it with my brother and his friends, a large group of friends who would often interdate. Observing the trials and tribulations of those relationships and the difficulty that they took upon themselves to keep the circle of friends intact even after these relaitonships melted away was amazing. Then in high school, thanks to my outside social circle, I was able to see a LOT of my friends going in and out of relationships. high school is where you learn the ropes (unless you were like me. Super nerd and the permanent platonic friend) and watching my friends going through all of that ("i'll love you forever"s turning into "I hate you"s, watching one of my friends go through 5 or 6 bfs in a few years, playing matchmaker too many times, etc. etc.). College was crazy too, as I saw all of the relationships that were supposively rock-solid in high school fall apart as soon as the first xmas vacation came around.
Bottom line: people are addicted to this shit. What is it about relationships that it causes us to go crazy?? Are people addicted to being in love, falling in love, or to the love itself? IT'S FUCKING INTERESTING I TELL U!!!!!! And of course there's the whole fact that the more i learn, the more i can help people, but more than that, the more i can appreciate it the next time it decides to find me.

We all carry so much burden on our backs. And I've realized and learned that there are so many defense mechanism that we throw around in order to keep from hurting. So many. It's amazing. The ultimate goal is to be at peace, right? but it seems so difficult. So damn difficult.

I think that's what they call maturity. It's sad that there are those who never really grow up, who never really mature. For exmample, I think that my mind is growing a lot faster than my heart. That's for sure. But hey, at least I'm making progress. Here's proof. A long time ago, I wrote in one of my "journals" that: "you have to be happy by yourself. Lets say your life is a cake. And everythign else (friends, relationship, etc.) is icing. Sometimes your cake will have icing, and that'll make it taste good. But sometimes, you cake won't. No icing. But cake without icing doesn't necessarily taste bad. You need to be able to have your cake without icing and be content. If you can't, then it'll always taste bad."

The first step is being able to be happy in your own skin, and to be okay with being alone. Alone as in just you. No friends, no significant other, no family. Just you yourself. No distraction.

It's like my friend, Brian Enriquez (the guy who's writings and thoughts got me started on really concentrating on my writing) said: "yo man, you can LOVE someone or something. there is nothing wrong with that. you can LOVE them to DEATH. But you should never ever ever NEED them". It's a strong statement, but fighting against dependency on something is difficult. I've had friends who were addicted to all of life's vices (nicotine, alcohol, gambling, the need to look slim, endless relationships, etc.) and i've realized myself that sometimes the line between what you want and what you need is blurred.

I hope that everyone who reads this blog (all 2 of you lol) are living life to the fullest. Life is as bad as you think it is, which is why you gotta think it out sometimes. There is no such thing as "letting it go" or "moving on". How do you move on when a friend or a parent passes away, or when you get fired from your dream job, or when you lose the love of your life? You just accept. Acceptance and letting go are NOT the same in my book. But then again, how often am i right? =P

Payce out A Town down. wtf that means. =P