some days i find no inspiration to write. Then some days it hits in the face with no warning.

First off, I was watching P. Diddy's "bad boys of comedy", a series on hbo. This show is like any other stand up comic show, except they can say bad words cuz it's on pay per view. And even though the viewer is forced to see p. diddy every show (wtf is he doing on the show anyways. he's not funny. and he can't dance either. Not that that has anything to do with comedy, but when you dance as bad as p. diddy, it makes everything you do seem dumber.). Anyways, there was this one comedian, big black guy, making jokes about how fat he was. I will not repeat the bit he did, because there is no way I want to take away from the funniness of it, but OMFG. I was laughing SO HARD. I have not LAUGHED THAT HARD in a LONG ASS TIME. I laughed SO hard that my eyes were pouring with tears, and the next day my abs were sore as FUCK. Then for days afterward, every time i thought of the bit, or said it out loud, i would crack up. Holy shit that was some funny shit.

Anyways, to the real reason for writing is for my 15 minute review of the movie "Jersey girl". This movie stars ben affleck, george carlin, and some little girl as ben's daughter. I have no idea what this movie is about. How little do i know? Well, i can't tell you the names of any of the characters, what the major plot crisis is, who the love interest is. Anyways, from the 15 minutes that i saw the movie I immediately thought, "bullshit!!!". Why? Two big reasons (I would have more, but I only saw 15 minutes).
1) No one would have an "awkward moment" with their friend when both of their emotions come out after a push. wtf. "just friends, right?" "right".
2) the bigger reason: So ben gets an interview for some firm in new york city. But he currently lives in new jersey with unknown little girl at his dad's, george carlin. Anyways, ben gets all happy and tells them all that he's gonna get a job there and they're gonna move back to new york city. Unknown little girl (ULG) then says she doesn't wanna go and says she doesn't want to move back there and throws a fit. BULLSHIT. If a parent worked as HIGH WAY WORKER (i think that's what he does), and he gets the opportunity to move to some city to get a job that pays a lot more, well...okay fuck that whole reasoning. I'll make it simple. Parent wants to move because of important financial reasons. Tells kid they're going to move. Kid complains. Parent says too bad. Kid complains some more. Parent offers if the kid would like to get a job scooping shit so that they an pitch in for the cost of living. Kid moves happily to new city and HANDLES it cuz that's what REALITY IS LIKE YOU LITTLE SHIT!!!!. LOL!!! Anyways, I've never moved (25 years in shitball san jose), but i would think that if your parents wanted to move due to FINANCIAL REASONS (dad or mom can get a much better job), then you SHUT YOUR FACE AND YOU HANDLE IT cuz WHO IS SUPPORTING YOUR ASS??? Yeah, ULG, YEAH! GET YOUR ASS OFF THE FLOOR CUZ YOU'VE BEEN SERVED!!! SERVED!!! SERVED !!! SERVED!!!

And finally, I will end with a joke said by Nick Dapalo (sp?) at Comedy Central's Roast of Pamela Anderson. He had just finished talking about how he used to masteurbate to her on baywatch every day onto his TV screen. "I used to wack off so much on your face I thought the only way I'd recognize you in public is if you had just smashed a glazed donut all over your face"

btw, i JUST got the joke. "I just flew in from ____ and boy are my arms tired." It's not that i didn't get the joke, it's that i didn't think about it and then like....ah fuck it...yeh i'm stupid. =P

Poppin' Robin is not a cool poppin' name because it has nothing to do with me.
Funkface is a much better poppin name for me but Jon already took that one.